No More Shyness

  “Having practiced the Alexander technique and yoga opens a lot up in you so you don’t feel as inhibited. When you find the sound that’s exactly perfect for you, you have no choice but to respond in a positive way.”
Ajay Naidu

If you are shy you will  feel inhibited, repressed and cautious. in certain settings.  Perhaps you have not found “the sound that’s exactly perfect for you, ….”

What does that mean?  To me it means your voice, your value, your honor, your personal brilliance, your essence.  I am not shy.  I love to meet new people and converse with them.  I have found my voice, my value, my honor, my personal brilliance, and my essence.  I know this sounds like I am stuck up and the center of the universe but that is not what I am saying here. 

What I am saying is that I enjoy meeting people, lerning about them, and hearing their stories.  In order for this to happen I have to be outgoing but I also have to exude an air of trust and easiness. 

Strangers need to feel that I will understand them and allow them to be themselves with me.  This usually happens on an initial meeting and in a short period of time.  This is my essence.  Doing what I enjoy (meeting people) and allowing them to feel safe with me so they can express themselves.  I usually do not talk about myself.  I usually listen to what they have to say. 

So how does this relate to someone who is shy?  Is this something you would enjoy, listening to someone tell you about themselves?  Perhaps if you are shy you think meeting new people is about you.  Perhaps if you let that go and changed the concept of meeting new people being about them you would feel relaxed.  The pressure would be off of you.  You needn’t feel inhibited because now you are a listener. 

Maybe meeting new people when you are shy is stressful because you feel you have to do something impressive to impress someone.  Not true.  You just have to be there with the other person.  You just have to bridge the gap between “you” and “them.”  You have to change “you” and “them” to “us.”

Get to know someone.  Learn about how they feel and what makes them tick.  By listening you learn about someone else but you also learn about yourself.  You will find that sound that is you. 

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Marcia, Your Confidence Coach